Sunday, November 28, 2010


Well, the weekend turned out to be better than expected. O and I are talking more than arguing and I got a lot of me time due to 4 days off from work. Which was desperately needed? Turkey day was filled with family and my brothers cooking. For once he was off from work and got to spend time with the family. He his a very busy guy since he works at a brand new restaurant in the city. We had a non traditional Thanksgiving dinner aka meaning no turkey. He substituted pork and chicken for the big bid which I was uber excited about. After dinner I sat with an older cousin of mine and my father making fun of our huge family and the ridiculousness that it is. I wish I would have been as close to my fathers family as I am my mothers. The way they described the way they grew up seemed a lot of fun. Toward the end of the night I took off and went to my mothers side of the family and went to have desert. That in its own is always an adventure. We had an Edible Arrangement :) and some cheese cake. There went my diet but I worked out so I don't feel so bad.
Sat was another me day I just lounged around the house until it was time to go off to see O's family. I spent the afternoon just talking with my mother-in-law, her sister, and O's grandmother. There is never a duel moment in that house. I love that I can just go there by myself and not feel like I'm intruding . O's little sister hung out and watch Nickelodeon all nigh. I have recently fallen in love with I-carly and can't get enough of it.
But to end my weekend I spent the day with my little cousins and got a chance to meet Ash's new boyfriend. He is a true gentlemen.. So excited that she found some more on her level. Its cool that she looks towards me for advice and acceptance when I comes to stuff like that. We had fun just watching each other playing video games and eating food. We spoke about colleges and goals. I cant believe in a year from now Ash will be looking at where she will being going to school and what she will be doing with her life. At the end of the night I went to celebrate my good friend from high school, Lauren's Birthday as Salty Dog. Well, heres the rest.
She is also a Kappa so it was a Kappa event in its self.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

...AnsWer This

So far november hasn't been my favorite month. Things have been going up and down. Im uncertain how the rest of the month will go but I'm glad I had a short work week to recuperate from the stress that has entered my life recently. Not everything is as the way it seems I'm learning that the hard way. I recently made an appt. to see a therapist so I can talk to someone without a bias opinion. I need to start the healing process with myself before I can let people back in. This isn't the 1st time I'm going to therapy and I'm not afraid to let people know I go. It's ok to talk to someone when you're having problems. It doesn't mean your crazy it means you're hurting. I hope that this works because I have not other options.

The holidays are here. Today is Thanksgiving and then comes Christmas. My family is doing construction in the house so there is no turkey this year which I'm actually glad about. The holidays and I don't mix. I don't like turkey and I hate christmas music. I might sound the Grinch but I've alway been this way. The only thing I look forward to is spending the morning with my little cousin. They give me a reason to breath. Their smiles brighten up my life and the little one still believes in Santa so its alway fun to hear her talk about him.

I'm watching the Thanksgiving Day parade which takes place here in NYC. I remember going every year with my parents as a child. Then going to my grandmothers house for dinner. I use to be a happy child during the holidays but over the years a lot has happened which have made the holidays bitter. This is the second holiday season O will be in Iraq. We were lucky we had last years together especially since I almost didn't make it last year.

I just wana wake up in January and hope I'm ok. Hope that we are ok.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Path ...

It's been a rough week, month, year. I really don't know where my strength comes from sometimes to even wake up in the morning. I thank my family everyday for pushing me to keep going but I have reached a breaking point of no return. I need to find myself and find peace with myself at the moment. It's hard to think about stuff without going into shock or tears falling down my face. I don't think my blogs will be getting much better. It's going to take a lot of time to fix myself and I don't know where to start. My body is numb to the world. I have no emotions and feelings are intertwined with each other. I don't know the difference between wrong or right, good or bad, or happy and sad. There will be an end to this I just have to find the right path. I need god right now and I need my head to clear up. I thank those who read my blog and learn from my experiences. I know I am not alone even if I feel that way. There is a light and it shines brighter than the sun.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

By By PlayGroUnd HElLo BartEndEr

After a long week at work it was time to head off to probably my last birthday in NY with the girls. It was Alison's 21st Birthday and My 23rd so we thought we do it big. We left my house around 2p.m. for an adventure and wound up finding paradise. We finally arrived at the hotel around 6P.m. after a few little detours. After setting up the room to prepare for the night festivities it was off to the buffet where we ate like royalty. I ran up to the room with Lisa to get some time to myself and enjoy her company. By 8 we were ready to start the night and well heres what happened next ....

Here's just a few photos from my fun filled weekend with the girls @
Harrah*s Casino in Atlantic ciTy

Welcome to Harrah*s

Birthday strawberries from the girls with my fav Champaign

Group Shot

SiLly KaPpa GiRLs

BEsT Friends ForEvEr <3

Sums Up THe Night ")

Trying to Get BacK to SleEp

Saw this on blog, thought it would be really fun..
(if you do not already, you should check out her blog )

1. What are your middle names?
I don't have a middle name .
His middle name is Falstino

2. How long have you been together?
Two years and one month. October 10th

3. How long did you know each other before you started dating?
8 months

4. Who asked who out?
He asked me out but I didn't know it was a date.

5. How old are each of you?
I am 23
He is 22 (will be 23 Feb. 8th)

6. Did you go to the same school?

7. Are you from the same home town?
No I grew up in Bay Ridge Brooklyn... He grew up in Richmond Hill Queens

8. Who is the smartest?
Im books smart he is street smart.

9. Who majored in what?
I majored in English
He majored infantry :)

10. Who is the most sensitive?
Both are equally sensitive but mostly me

11. Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
New York.

12. Who has the worst temper?
Wow that is hard… we both have bad tempers... **

13. How many children do you want?
We both want around 3 kids .. he wants a girl 1st

14. Who does the cooking?
I do but he definitely a better cook :)

15. Who is more social?
We are both very outgoing but he lights up the room,

16. Who is the neat freak?
I am but I can be messy sometime too. He just leaves his pt's on the floor

17. Who is the most stubborn?
We can both agree we are both stubborn

18. Who wakes up earlier?
I love to sleep in he is alway up and ready to go

19. Where was your first date?
COld stones but i swear i didn't know it was a date

20. Who has the bigger family?
I do my grandparents had 20 kids <3

21. Do you get flowers often?
I use to get them all the time when he was here… but i just got a bunch for my birthday ")

22.How do you spend the holidays?
Equally we try to kit both families but with his parents being divorced its even more divided time.

23. Who is more jealous?
I think we are both equally jealous but i show it more

24. How long did it take to get serious?
Almost immediately we were engaged after being together for 2 week. But we were friend for almost a year before we got together. We waited 7 months to get married.

25. Who eats more?
He eats like it's his MOS

26. What do you do for a living?
I am an assistant in at a communications company
he is an 11c

27. Who does the laundry?
I do.

28. Who’s better with the computer?
He knows how to work them I just do face book

29. Who drives when you’re together?
It depends I drive when he's not in the mood but mostly he dose the driving from point A to B.

30. What is your song?
Good Question.

A RanT of Frustration

Saturday, November 6, 2010

BiRthDay LoVing

Yesterday was my 23rd birthday and it started off with a bang on Thursday. I am lucky enough to work in a company where ones hard work is never gone Un-noticed. My supervisor who is also HR remembered it was my day off and it was my birthday so she bought me a cupcake from CRUMBS cupcakes which was absolutely amazing and kind of her because they are pretty pricey and filled with a ton of calories.

We also had lunch in the office due to the fact I was raining cats and dogs... But after my day was over it was time to head home and hang with my mommy. I decided this Birthday was going to be about hanging out with her due to the fact this will probably be one of the last birthdays we would be in the same state for a while. We did our usual Thursday night routine . I worked out ate dinner and played with the dogs and then We snuggled up to watch Grey's and Private Practice. Which both episodes were pretty good.

The birthday day was pretty simple. Once again nothing crazy but run some errands Like going to the DMV for No Reason then off to the doctors for a check up. Which both too longer than expected but I was lucky I came home to flowers from O <3

Thanks Baby <3

Which was a nice surprise because O isn't really good on doing things on time. I ordered some Chopstix (Chinese food) for dinner and hung out with my mom until it was time to run up the block and go see Lisa and Mgr. Kain. Ever Friday ever since I was in high school I go to the church to see my favorite people, and of course Lisa. She's been working there since I can remember. Its nice having my church close enough I just pop in and say hello.

After my visit at church my mommy took me to get my nails done of course "). I love our bonding time sometimes she can be my worst enemy but most of the time she is my bestest friend. Hope you like my birthday weekend choice.

Smokin Hot by Essie

Well it time to pack and get ready Ihave a weekend adventure ahead of me <3

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Jolly the Muffin Top Giant

Its been a not so adventurous week even with election day work was slow Monday and yesterday I actually was helping out another team who had an assistant walk out on them for no apparent reason but " he couldn't do it any more". Some people are just not meant to be in my line of business even if they were only there for 3 weeks. Money doesn't come cheap and if you think you can just sit around and wait for it to come to you, you have another thing coming (unless you get a welfare check or unemployment that's another story for another day).

This past weekend O's family had a gathering at his great Aunt's house. The family was on Skye with him when I got there and he looked sad because he was unable to be there with us. I felt kind of guilty to be there in place of him. He had broken down when they spoke about his late great grand mother who had past last time he was deployed and the last thing on his mind was me. After the conversation with O finished we had dinner and some good conversation time as more family had arrived. Then is was picture time ....

Of course before I went to see O's family I had to run to the nail salon :). I get my weekly mani with my new pick of the week...

mink muffs by Essie
This manicure also came with a $35 ticket because even with my less than 15 mins wait time to get in a chair I wasn't quick enough to get back to baying the parking meter. One think I miss about Texas is free parking lots. The city is filled with paid parking because there are so many people in NY the city knows they can get away with it. Uggg o well my nail came out lovely as always and now even O asked to see them because I goo so much ") he's such a girl. Speaking of him being a girl, O just finished his 1st Nicholas Sparks boo "True Believer". He picked it up because he knew I loved Nicholas Sparks books. It was nice of him to pick up one of my hobbies it gave us a good conversation topic and I just loved seeing his reactions to the story line.

Sunday was Halloween which use to be more exciting. I didn't dress up the past 2 year nor did I attend any Halloween events, and only 2 trick-o-treaters came to the door. The highlight of my night was seeing my little princess come to pick up her usually Halloween bag and seeing my god daughter dressed up as Miss Lady Gaga herself.


She looked like a young lady rather than a growing 16 year old. It's crazy how these kids are growing up so fast. They were just little babies a second ago and now Ash is getting ready to go to college in a years time and shayla is entering high school and little miss Gaby is way beyond her 3 years.

The last few days some of the girls have been receiving their husbands back for their R&R breaks. Ill admit the little green giant filled my mind and eyes green with jealousy and envy, but I know my day will come soon. Which is why I'm working hard to whip this body into sexy mama shape. So far since I've been dieting I've lost 4 more pounds. Which brings my total weight lost to 9 pounds since I moved to NY. I hope to lose 16-20 more pounds by his arrival. Your probably thinking this girl is crazy but I believe its necessary not just to look good but for my health as well. I'm over 30 pounds over weight so half of that is just the 1st bench mark of where I need to actually need to be.

.... Baby your drug....